Thursday, October 9, 2008

Dispatch from "Angryville"

Really, "Angryville" is the dateline T.J. Simers puts on this morning's bomb of a column:

ANGRYVILLE -- You spend any time in this dingy city and around these folks, and pit bulls running wild come to mind.Fine when leashed, but set them free, put a beer in their grubby paws and it's only a matter of time before they're going to go on the attack -- both the home team and its opponent feeling the bite.

It's an angry place, all right, everything old here in Philadelphia, crumbling and in ruin. Even the city's main attraction has a crack in it. So the prevailing opinion around here is you have to be an obstinate pug to make it in Philly, the football team tough, the hockey team a bunch of bullies and the Phillies rugged competitors like Larry Bowa.
Simers goes on to handicap the series, figuring that the Dodgers will at least split the first two games. Then it comes to L.A.:

But then it really turns ugly for the Phillies, who can only throw 100-year-old softball pitcher Jamie Moyer at the Dodgers and then just another guy in Joe Blanton.
But what if things don't go the way Simers thinks they will and the series goes back to Philly?

Now as intimidating as Philly likes to think it is, could the Dodgers come up with one win in Game 6 or Game 7 to move on?"If it comes down to that," Manager Joe Torre said, "we can get one more win."

So there you go, the Phillies lose again, but then what's new?
For the record, I don't much like Simers, mostly because of his habit of baiting and harassing players and putting himself in the middle of his columns. I have to admit, however, that I do sort of like his generalized misanthropy from time to time, and a little bit of trash talk always adds some fun to a sporting event.


matt said...

Did he remember to put in the part where we booed Santa and threw snowballs? Man, that never gets old!

Sportswriters must love it when Philadelphia teams make the playoffs. "I'll just pull out my 'Philadelphia fans are teh meanies and they suck' column and call it a day."

christopher said...

RE: MSM vs. Blogging - these are the types of articles that work so much better on a blog. If I had read that on a dodgers blog, I'd think it was funny. But it just seems distasteful when newspaper guys - who harp about the sanctity of their profession whenever it comes under attack - write this kind of stuff.

Richard Dansky said...

Astonishing. A grumpy old man just told an entire city to get off of his lawn.