Tigers 8, Rangers 2: Here's a great example of what three games against the Rangers can do for a team: when the Tigers woke up on Tuesday morning, they were on a pace to score 664 runs for the year. As they wake up this morning, they are on a pace to score 838. Also worth noting: the Tigers have yet to play a game with Cabrera at first and Guillen at third since Leyland's grand unveiling of his new defensive alignment.
Astros 5, Reds 2: We live in a fast moving age. Evidence: Johnny Cueto (7 IP, 8 H, 5 ER) has gone from spectacular to solid to sub-par in the space of exactly three weeks.
Rockies 4, Cubs 2: I've frequently wondered how often teams phone in these Thursday afternoon getaway day games. This one -- played before both teams had to get on airplanes --lasted 2:18. Hmmmm.
Indians 9, Royals 6: A Scorpion, being a very poor swimmer, asked a Turtle to carry him on his back across a river. "Are you crazy?" exclaimed the Turtle. "You'll sting me while I'm swimming and I'll drown." "My dear Turtle," laughed the Scorpion, "if I were to sting you, you would drown and I would go down with you. Now where is the logic in that?" "You're right!" cried the Turtle. "Hop on!" The Scorpion climbed aboard and halfway across the river gave the Turtle a mighty sting. As they both sank to the bottom, the Turtle resignedly said: "Do you mind if I ask you something? You said there'd be no logic in your stinging me. Then why did you do it?" "It has nothing to do with logic," the drowning Scorpion sadly replied. "It's just my character."
Indians 2, Royals 0: Brian Bannister pitched like Maddux again (6.2 IP, 4 H, 2 ER) but unfortunately for him it was late-career Maddux rather than 1995 Maddux. Cliff Lee, on the other hand, pitched like 1966 Koufax (CG shoutout, 3 H, 9K). On the season Lee is 4-0, 0.28 ERA with 29K and 2 BB in 31.2 IP. Um, Wow.
Braves 7, Marlins 4: It was Chipper Jones' birthday, and he had this to say: "I always feel like I need to do something cool on my birthday," the third baseman said. "Hit a homer or have three hits. I would have taken either one, to be honest. Today, I got 'em both. It was awesome." Chipper Jones on his birthday:
2008: 3-3, HR, RBI
2007: 1-6, 2B
2006: on the DL
2005: 1-2, 2 BB
2004: on the DL
2002: 2-3, RBI
2001: 2-5, 2 HR, 3 RBI
2000: day off
1998: 4-5, 2B, 3 R, RBI
1997: day off
1996:4-5, 2B, HR, 2 RBI
1995: season hadn't started yet due to players' strike.