Thursday, April 10, 2008

And That Happened

Tigers 7, Red Sox 2: And there was much rejoicing. In other news, the Tigers magic number is now 160.

Reds 12, Brewers 4: I read this article once about a guy who had such a bad case of obsessive compulsive disorder that he decided to kill himself. Took a gun and blasted a hole in his head. Thing was, the bullet traveled just so that it lopped off the exact portion of his frontal lobe which was responsible for his OCD, but caused no other damage. He survived, and even better, his disorder was cured. I offer that anecdote to remind you that, just because someone realizes a good outcome doesn't mean the decision which led to that outcome was a good one. In related news, Reds leadoff hitter Corey Patterson is batting .323/.353/.839 with four homers and eight RBI. Dusty Baker no doubt plans to cock the pistol and fire again in this afternoon's rubber match.

Royals 4, Yankees 0: Zach Greinke (8 IP, 6 H, 0 ER) shuts down the Bombers. Remember lo, those many weeks ago (2, if I recall) when we wondered which lineup -- the Tigers or the Yankees -- was more pee-in-the-pants inducing? Well, the only team in the AL the Yankees have outscored is the Tigers.

Mets 8, Phillies 2: The Phillies' Eric Bruntlett gets a rare start at short. Given that he backs up a guy who almost never misses a game, and given that the game was on national TV, he probably called back home to Indiana or wherever to make sure that Mom and God and everyone was watching. He then commits two errors in the bottom of the third, helping the Mets score six unearned runs. The next half inning consists of about 37 minutes worth of tight closeups of an agonizing Bruntlett in the Phillies' dugout as Joe Morgan talks about just how mad a player can get when he messes up in the field. Hi mom!

Giants 1, Padres 0: Dan Ortmeier comes in as a pinch runner in the seventh and is promptly caught stealing. Atones by driving in the game's only run with a two-out double in the bottom of the ninth propelling the Giants to victory. Oh, and four Giants pitchers combining to shut out the Padres -- striking them out 12 times -- helped an awful lot. The Giants will probably cite this game many, many times in the future as they are forced to answer for their poor offensive production. "Sure, we've only scored 423 runs, but numbers don't tell the whole story. Remember all of those 1-0 wins we had way back in April?"

Rockies 12, Braves 6: The Chuck James Experience (3 IP, 5 H, 6 ER) is back in Atlanta, reminding the rest of the world why Frank Wren went out and signed Tom Glavine.

Cubs 6, Pirates 4 (15 innings): This game went so long that starters Ryan Dempster (7 IP, 1 H, 0 ER) and Zach Duke (7 IP, 1ER) were available to pitch again in the 15th inning if they were needed. Of course, they were probably so mad at their teammates for wasting their excellent starts that they had showered and left the park in a huff by then.

8 comments:

Chris Heer said...

THANK YOU for the comment about the gun, OCD, and Corey Patterson.

Remember, boys and girls: coincidence != causality. This goes back to the fundamental arguments about pitcher W-L records, "knowing how to win," and all that. Just wait, Reds fans, luck will run out and the laws of probability will bite your rear ends quite soon.

Alex said...

That Giants/Pads game took just over two and a half hours! If they keep playing games like that they might find what fans they do have sticking around past the 7th inning. Silver lining, right?

Anonymous said...

Ort Knocks.

cobweb said...

Shyster, I recall you saying something like "Cain and Lincecum and pray for rain." I spit on that comment. Check out the N.L leaders in strikeouts and you might find one, Jonathan Sanchez, owner of some nasty stuff.

Pete Toms said...

Ort's first hit as a recovering switch hitter! He hit RH vs a RH for the first time in his big league ( don't know about minor ) career!

Jake said...

It was "Lincecum, Cain, pray for rain". Much better, 'cuz it rhymes ! ;-)

cobweb said...

good call jake...good call.

drpaisley said...

We didn't have to pray for rain in KC last night, we had metric craploads.* And cold? The concession stands ran out of coffee and cocoa. But Greinke was absolutely incredible, especially considering the conditions. Don't know how long this can last, but I'm going to enjoy it while it does.

Steinbrenner Delenda Est!


*That's, like, scientific, what with the metric thing and all