Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Pete Rose has a Self-Serving Opinion? Really?

Pete Rose has an opinion about steroids. You may be shocked to learn that it's a self-serving one. It's going to air in Dennis Miller's show tonight on the Versus network, but since no one watches that, here it is:

"I've been suspended 18 years for betting on my own team to win,'' he added. "I was wrong ... but these guys today, if the allegations are true, they're making a mockery of the game.''

No Pete, steroid users are simply obtaining an unfair advantage. They'd be making a mockery of baseball if they did it, admitted it and agreed to be banned from the game, immediately reversed themselves and railed against their ban, and then, just when some people's positions were starting to soften over the whole affair, pulled yet another reversal and admitted they had been lying for 15 years in order to sell some merch.

Not that we know anyone who has done that . . .


jnr98 said...

MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ack, please pixelate or blur that image for the sake of future readers. That's ghastly.

Shyster said...

Sorry, jnr, but I feel the decision to run a picture of Charlie Hustle in his banana hammock furthers a legitimate editorial goal: Rose has accused steroid users of making a mockery of the game. By running this picture, ShysterBall furthers the interests of fair and balanced reporting by (a) establishing beyond reasonable doubt that Rose himself did not take steroids while (b) providing some perspective regarding what, in fact, makes a mockery of the game.

And all be damned if those underpants don't make a mockery of SOMETHING.

jnr98 said...

See, now I had to look closer at the offending evidence. I feel dirty. I blame you!

(love the work!)


jnr98 said...

And also, have you ever seen any human, save Robin Williams, with hairier arms than Rose? He's got a higher threadcount than my sheets at home.